Do you know what your partner is wearing today? Do you know what their concerns are for this week? I have heard things like, “It has been two weeks and s/he has not noticed that I cut my hair.” It seems that complacency can set in and partners stop paying attention to each other.

There is unfortunately too much truth in the observation that we hurt those we love the most. We have these insecurities that seem to get triggered more easily by those we love. Once those insecurities are triggered our behavior can become less than stellar. Why do we respond the way we do? Our behavior does little to help us get our needs met. We get sucked into the drama, rather than finding solutions. The answer is …