Emotional resilience is what allows us to bounce back after a difficult time. Everyone finds ways to cope with their own particular set of problems. Human beings are incredibly adaptable. However, some coping strategies are more destructive than others. Resiliency is the ability to cope well with challenges and difficulties. Some people seem to be more naturally resilient than others. Naturally resilient people tend to roll with the punches, have a more optimistic outlook, be persistent (or stubborn), see challenges as opportunities and look for the humor or the silver lining. The good news is that even if you do not feel like you are emotionally resilient, it is possible for you to strengthen your emotional resilience. Here are some suggestions:
Pay attention to your gut feelings and needs. Give yourself some extreme self-care. Eat healthy, exercise in some way you enjoy and get enough rest.
Know That You Can Heal
Know that as human beings we have a tremendous ability to adapt and to heal. You are stronger than you imagine. You may need some help to get there, but you can be whole again.
Get A Reality Check
We understand that when we have a cold, we cannot trust our sense of smell or taste. Things do not smell or taste the way they should. In the same way, when we are down on our self, we cannot trust our thoughts. Connect with friends and loved ones. Do not try to go it alone. Many times other can help you see things more realistically.
Adjust Your Perspective
Come from the perspective that there are no insurmountable problems. Recognize that there is no failure, only feedback. Consider challenges as a growth opportunity. Amy Purdy in her TED talk Living Beyond Limits asks, “If your life were a book and you were the author, how would you want your story to go?” She then goes on to demonstrate that we can adjust our perspective to help us overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles.
Accept That You Are Doing The Best You Can
Give yourself credit for the ways that you do support and look after yourself and know that you will get there. Choose realistic goals and keep taking steps in the direction of your goals.
Accept What You Cannot Change
When we stop fighting against the things we cannot change, we free up our energy to work on changing the things that we can change. Recognize that you get to choose your thoughts and behavior. Choosing to accept what cannot be changed brings peace and compassion.
Know That This Too Shall Pass
The sun rises after every dark night. Know that sometimes life is hard and that is okay, because you can do hard things. Scott Peck, author of The Road Less Traveled, discovered that when we admit and understand that life is simply difficult at times, it ceases to be so difficult.
Play To Your Strengths
Increasing self-awareness, especially an awareness of your strengths will help increase resilience. Accept that you are wonderful just the way you are. See yourself in a positive light. What if you considered your flaws to be quirky instead of horrible?
Know That Asking For Help Is A Sign Of Courage Not Weakness